my confension

its complicated...~ don't wana tell... hahahahaha.... nacau abg nyaa nie... xP love abg...:P hahahahha....



BLOGRAPE...:P next time sign out lai... hahahahhaa....

missing Identification card

it's not my ic that went missing. it's my mom's. yeah, so it's suppose to be not my fault if this happens cause she was the one who was holding her own ic. but this was different, yesterday as i was going to the mall, my brother was photocopying my mom's ic and then i ask him where to pun her ic. i was actually thinking to pun it im my wallet, but then he said 'just put it in my file' and i did and then i went to the mall.

then, when i woke up, my brother asked me where was my mom's ic. i said it was in his fail but he said it wasnt there. so i was...dont tell me it went missing. in the kitchen where my mom was there, my brother suddenly told me it wasnt there and my mom heard us. she then went explosive like a bomb and started lecturing the both of us.

well..it was our fault for loosing her ic and i was blame because i didnt put it in my wallet and my brother was blame for not keeping it safe. so...for the pass few hours, me and my brother got the time of our life, full of lectures and everything. so yeah...great day for the last day of the year.....

anyway, my brother is actually force to go back to kota batu to look for the ic cause it might fall there. thought my brother was a bid of a bad tempered but he knew it was his fault too so yeah...sigh..what a day to remember~

2009

2009......hmmm...what should i say about this...for me this year is the year of many leanings.....firstly this is the year of the big PMB exam which i pass ;p anyway....i like 2009 cause

1. I got new bestfriends
2. i met haziq! XD baik ah ia ah
3. i got a second chance by my beloved cg salnee
4. my maths is improving!!!
5. i became a love doctor *wink wink babe qilah*
6. started to get more mature
7. experience new things
8. started to be a rapper a few days~
9. went to spent time with my best friends a lot
10. first hang out to the beach with my class
11. first bbq with my friends
12. LEARNED NEW THINGS!!!!

the thing i hate this year

1. betrayed by my best friends
   
2. regret doing something that i shouldn't
3. meeting someone
4. knowing a girl i hate until now
5. getting crazy for a month
6. not thinking of my best friends when i was crazy
7. knowing that i'm terrified of snakes =='

anyway...so yeah....that the things that i like and hate. reason? you sure?? hey im talking to my self right now...so my reason why i like having new friends are because i lost my old best friends. okay, i didnt really lost them, i just fent different after they did what they did to me. so yeah...that's y i like having new bestfriends, my Babe qilah n bebek feefah!

hahaha, i met haziq was actually my first and top reason why i like 2009. but his' my best friends, so yeah~ but i really thought he was a bad guy at the beginning of the year. cause i actually heart him as a playboy and yeah...i think all play boy are bad, but his nice..and his not a playboy surpriseingly...despite the fact hus attractive..not that im admitting he is~ cause his not. sometimes it's great to have a weird point of view hahaha

second chance...hmm yeah!...im soo grateful that she gave me a second chance!!!! apann yath ganya ku buat tu? yeah maths is improving~ still higher than haziq which me loike!!! hahahaah. love doctor to bebek! wrong! hahaahah babeeeee XD okay, what else? more mature....yeah...im a bit mature...in LOVE LOL! hahahahaah. okay....the other eason let's just leave it there okay~

about the thing i hate, about the betrayed i already wrote it this month or last month? then...i regret doing the thing i did which leads to me friends leaving me.....which i also wrote that....abt the girl i hate. i seriously hate herrrr so to the max damn fuking much!!!! and you know how i do if i hate a person so much!!! thought i try not to hurt her IF she didnt bother me or my friend. if she do...well say hello to Mrs Fist!

going crazy...hmmm...not talking about that, okay about the snakes part. i actually started to hate snakes eversince my ex said he had a snake and showed a picture of him wtih that snake. i was grose about it and then i started to be afraid of it. so yeah...dont give me snakes or even talk about it...or i'll be screaming or hitting you bt the next few seconds~ ;p

overall...this is the best year i've ever had! cause i've been camping and meeting new people and getting new experiences and getting a lot of love advise. then i also had new bestfriends which made me having 10 in total!!! and a big wow cause i was somehow getting the help i need from my bestfreinds. thnks guys!!!!!!!!!!!! XD

having fun? no way

so i went to the mall just now...it was great, we arrived at the mall around 10 and then used the lift since baby qilah is soooooooo lazy to used the escalator. i was 'fine bh mna ja layan~'and we then went to buy some tickets. the guy was really nice, thought i wasnt interested in him but he was alright. XD getting a habit of looking at guys just then. we bought alvin then after that sherlock homes. we bought a couple seat where he said 'inda kmu mau couple seat?' ku liat babe ku ane 'bh mna ja' and i said 'layan!!' and org atu tekjut th plg yg kmi mau. kmi lantak ja ne! LOL

then after that kmi liat alvin lh smpi kul 12...lapas atu kmi turun ke utama grand kn cri my mommy punya request-kerupok udang-which is for tomorrow to kb. anyway after that, we met up with Feefah. then we buy some ticket for her but she went to sit with us at the couple seat. well yeah, it was sadis but who cares, it was fun! XD

well...fun when a couple went to seat next to us at the couple seat....like hell, okay we thought they were innocent. wearing Tudong and everything (that girl) then after half of the story...suddenly feefah looked at the couple beside us and i followed her gaze. like the couple was KISSING in public! and we looked at the movie which was like....OMG...you've got to be kidding me!! i looked back at the couple and they were still doing it. we started to laugh until our stomach starts to ache, when i look back at them thinking that they would stop, i was wrong! they kept doing it for like another few minutes and then they... i dont know the hell what they were doing after that. maybe hugging or what ever. then after that, they went to actually watch the movie again but then suddenly babe Qilah went to seat at the front. i was like...??? and i feefah looked at the couple again, i followed and i was the girl was lying on the guy's lab...with her HEAD DOWN ON THE GUY'S you know what!!! i was the fuck! like hell!

i looked at feefah but she didnt seem to get my face. after a while we went back looking at the movie but we lost our concentration as we take a peek every few seconds at the couple. so i guess they were doing the very stupid thing in public. and i could guess they dont really mind us, being next to them. with out eyes on them. and i also could guess that that guy was having the time of his life with his girlfreind doing what she was doing.

yes i know it's very annoying and very stupid and i really hate it. okay i admit, it might be great and fun and very addictive, but hello!!! look around! there are people who would want to see the movie. it doesn't means that every people who used the couple seat is a couple who would want to do the things they did...like hell! even i dont want to do that!!!!! even if i was in a relationship or whatever! i dont want to even do that even if i was married! it BLOODY PUBLIC people! get the picture and get it in your head!!!!! i know im sooooooo stressed out because of this...but who wouldnt be? i was trying to have a good movie and this was what i get?? a free show? i didnt ask for this!!! i seriously didnt!

so moral for people who are in love..thought this is not a story that i made up....DONT DO THINGS THAT IS OVER THE TOP IN PUBLIC OR EVEN NOT PUBLIC! mun kawin udh mnaja kmu puas2 inda ku melarang...mun alum kawin atu jgn th dlu kn gila2! mun bukn laki mu akhirnya malu ja kauu yooooo

waiting...

hmm...getting ready to go to the mall. well im alredy dress and ready, though my brother is alredy home. he suddenly told me that he had a car accident. it was fine thought, and only a few minor injuries to his baby car. his fine and the person who hit him was an old man. my bro was about to get mad at him but when he was that it was an old man, he just kept quite and said okay....they went to some workshop at kota batu i think and the old man agreed to pay everything. nice right?? and a very good ending at that as well. thought its still not fixed since he was going to have a meeting today at 10 and we were going to go before 9 to the mall.

i actually haven't told my brother about Babe Qilah joining me to go to the mall and her asking to pick her up at hajma. i told my mom to tell my bro hahaha, im a bit of a scary cat because of that ;p

yeah, daddy aka ayam cant come to the mall today and it's just us girls. though i wonder if idi was comming....well he'll msg me if he did. anyway what else am i going to write, im getting ready...udah jua tu...hmmm....wanting to get my blog stay alive cause i've been bz with fb only..though fb is getting bored now a days because i dont do much at it. only play some games which i never got to play them anymore. even my pet society is dead or weak what ever. anyway...soo....i guess.....*msg ringtone +reading msg* wow!!! my babe is seriously early! (qilah) she's already at hajma to wait for me. damn....so i'll just have to wait for her at my house corner....simpang rumah...my mom ask her to wait at my house.

bh cheers stay happy-appy

His last request

this story is dedicated to Afeefah, Baby Aqilah, HHIKA, MB3C and my friends n BRANDON! who was really excited for this story ;p, and who ever is in love and what ever, remember what ever happens, there have to be a reason=)





‘I wish time would stop...so that the time I have with you can make you happy and I wouldn’t have to see the end, where it all disappear in a blink of an eye and shattered like millions of glass. But I will still love you sigh' was all I could describe his feelings at that time. For he, who have loved his lover so much that he himself have suffered, this is a story of lovers who never got to be in the end, but are meant to, in the near future.





HIS LAST REQUEST

(suppose to be the title..but you know what happened...)






It takes so many years to understand what love is, and so many experiences. But, as you understand it, you feel lost in it, and at last, everything breaks apart in a blink of an eye.

It was his first day as a teacher in an Elite school. He was nervous and felt a bit afraid for making the students liked him. A few months pass and he went to be friends with the other teachers; Sir Wayne and Sir Dylan. One day, as he was in Sir Wayne’s class, he started to laugh.

“What’s wrong Isabella? Thinking that Sir Lewis handsome?” asked Sir Wayne suddenly, with a smile he then said. “Which one of us are you attracted the most?”

Isabella-as her friends called her Bella-was a very friendly girl. She talks to everyone she knows and had fun making new ones especially in her new school. “You are very sweet” she said as to rely her teacher’s question. Lewis then went back to laughing, harder than the previous one and longer as well. “Bella!” shouted her friend suddenly, calling her to join them as they were going to their next class. “Wait for me, don’t leave me!” she shouted back as she rushed to get her fallen stuff on the floor and dashed out of class.

“Who was that girl?” asked Lewis to Wayne.

“That my friend was the most crack up student I ever had. If she was your student, your life would be as fun as you had just then but even crazier” praised Wayne.

Lewis was shocked by Wayne’s comment on that simple girl he just met, but he was interested to know more about her. “So what’s her name?” asked Lewis.

“Isabella, her friends called her Bella but I liked calling her Bel” Wayne chuckled.

“Isabella” Lewis repeated silently then Wayne gave him a paper with an email written on them.

Lewis looked at him puzzled, Wayne winked at him. “That her email” he announced.

At home, looking at her email, Lewis added her thinking to make fun of her. As they started chatting, Bella was shocked by the anonymous chatter who had added her. They kept talking and Lewis kept annoying her until the verge where Bella actually swear at him. After having to laugh so much, then the anonymous chatter revealed himself to Bella. Smiling, Lewis told Bella it was him, and Bella didn’t enter the chat room for a period of 2 days.

When Bella realized that she was chatting with a teacher of her school, she was shocked, she even swore at him which made it even worse. After thinking to herself, she decided to apologize to the teacher and that was the start of their relationship.

As days passes, they chatted almost everyday, debated on almost everything in their head. They started gossiping on the students which helped Lewis on which students to avoid or keep an eye on. When Lewis started to get some problems, he told Bella about his problems, and she helped him solve them. Since then they started to help each other and they became best friends. Despite the fact that they became close day by day, it was different at school; they never talked, met or even looked at each other. Bella was fortunate to be in one of his classes that year.

Next year came, and Bella told one of her close friends about her chat with a teacher in the school.

“Are you kidding me!” shouted Alice in surprise “Sir Lewis is the person you ch-” she didn’t got long with her words, Bella shut her mouth whispering

“Shhhh, I told you to keep it quite!”

“Okay, but you know that teacher is the ‘IT’ teacher in this school?” said Alice “all the seniors are crazy for him”

Bella ignore Alice and kept walking towards their class.

“Come on Bella! How you got his email? And I can’t believe his the guy you’ve been chatting with since last year!” said Alice again. She was still shocked by her best friend big secret.

“Like I told you Alice, keep it down” said Bella, but she could hold it in anymore, “you just can’t believe it Alice! He is so not the person you see when you gone chatting with him!!”

“Really? I thought he was a bit of a mystery, but then again. I never get why people are crazy about him”

“He has that bad chicken hair that I always tease him with”

“Mohawk?? Yeah, doesn’t suit him at all” laughed Alice and their conversation about the famous teacher went all night.

One night, after a long chat between the teacher and student, Lewis felt something that he wasn’t sure off. But deep in his heart he did, he ignored it. He tried to case it aside but it grew stronger, he tried to avoid the student, but he kept missing her every time he did that. ‘What am I thinking?’ he thought. ‘I have a girlfriend, fiancée to be exact. I shouldn’t think about this at all, but then this feeling is the same as how I first met Alisa’ he shake his head. ‘No, I shouldn’t think about this at all’ he decided and hid the feelings away.

When the secret is out on Alice, Lewis added her and they chatted. Although it was a lot different that she imagine, and what Bella had told her was true. The thing was for Alice, Bella told her that she and Lewis was so different like black and white. But when she chatted with the both of them, it was like chatting with the same person but the only different was it was on another conversation. The three of them were having fun chatting together, although they never actually chatted in a group chat, but it was as if they were talking in a group at the same time.

Day by day, Alice somehow noticed something different between Lewis and Bella, but as a kid she case it away, ‘Bella said Lewis got married early this year, it can’t be’ she thought and let it be. After a few months, she changes her mind after an amazing incident at school.

As they were having their break together at their favorite spot, Bella and Alice discuss about Lewis strange behavior during their chat.

“His as crazy as a wild animal when you get to know him better” said Bella smiling. Alice took a bit on her sandwich.

“I’ll-munch-pass on that” said Alice “I’ve just known him and his already crazy like you”

“We are not the same, there’s a difference in gender”

“And yet your personality are-” Alice began but she didn’t got any further than that, someone suddenly pulled her away.

“Alice?” asked Bella bewildered.

“Look out!” someone shouted. When Bella looked around, something solid collided with her and fell off her chair.
“Bella!”

She opened her eyes but seeing six people was looking at her. A had stretched out towards her and she took it. A jolt of shocked arouse her awareness of her surroundings.

“what happened?” she asked puzzled.

“You were hit by a ball on the face” started Alice

“Are you okay?” asked a new voice. Bella looked to her right, the person who was holding her hand; he was standing beside Alice and recognizes the new face immediately.

“Sir!?” she shouted. She let go of her hand and fell back to the floor.

“Be careful” warned another new voice suddenly who helped her up.

“Here, let me Luke” said Alice and helped Bella up.

“How did you get here?” asked Bella suddenly.

“I’ll tell you about that later, now are you okay?” insisted Alice wondering if her friend was really fine.

All the three people looked at her and waited for her answer where she suddenly realized “oh, you’re asking me?”

It turns out that Luke actually pulled Alice out of the way but failed to pull Bella out on time. The following day, they started to talk about the incident that got Bella knocked down to the ground. As the conversation got further, Bella went quite.

“What?” asked Alice after a few second.

Bella hesitate, but asked “why was he there?”

“Who, Luke?”

“No” Bella paused again then bit her lip, “him” she said again hoping that Alice would understand.

“You mean Lewis?” Alice asked smiling. Alice thought about it for a while before answering Bella’s question. “He was actually at the canteen as well and he saw the incident. That’s why he was there, why?”

“Nothing” said Bella “it just felt a bit different”

Alice kept quite, thinking the time where their hand touched. ‘It’s as if they received an electric shocked, wonder how that teacher is doing’

Lewis looked at his hand that had hold Bella’s hand. ‘It felt so weird’ he thought, ‘it’s the same feeling like I’ve met Alisa. But it’s a lot stronger’

“Hey” said Sir Dylan suddenly interrupting his thoughts.

“What is it?” asked Lewis still a bit daze with his thoughts.

“I heard you helped my cousin just now at the canteen” said Dylan.

“Your cousin?” repeated Lewis. The first person he thought was Alice,

“Yes, Isabella. Was she okay?” he asked.

‘Bella?’ he shocked. “Yes, she was alright. Only a slight light headed, I think” informed Lewis. “So, how are the both of you related?” asked Lewis again after a moment of silence.

A few days after the ball incident, they were chatting as usual. Bella was chatting with Alice, Lewis and her cousin-who she just found out-Dylan. Lewis on the other hand was chatting with Bella, Lewis and Dylan and Alice was only chatting with Lewis and Bella. They chatted normally between Bella and Lewis but different when they suddenly started chatting with Alice. Bella was troubled for the pass few days after the incident as well as Lewis and let it out on Alice. Bella told Alice that she was feeling weird towards their teacher. At the same time Lewis told Alice the same thing. After hearing a few words form the both of them, Alice figured it out. She asked the both of them about it they answered with a bit of a resistance but it was true.

After a few more chat, Alice made up her mind to tell the two of them of their true words. She invited the two of them in a group chat, and then Alice gave them a bit of a clue and then let then figured it out on their own. When they figured it out, Bella freaked out and left the conversation. Lewis was a bit different, he asked Alice was it true and she told him yes.

That night, Lewis called Bella to take her as his girlfriend, Bella refused for the pass few weeks but finally she agreed. Their relationship was hidden and the only person that knew about them was Alice, Dylan and Wayne. Bella always discuss about their relationship with Alice. Although Alice was younger that her, but she always gave great advice to her and helped in any way that she could. Bella always felt insecure about Lewis as he was a married guy and also a teacher in her school.

Alice always tried to convince her that Lewis was serious, “come on Bella, I can see it from the way he talks about you”

“His a good actor” insisted Bella “he can lie to me just like that”

“So what do you want to do? Leave him just like that and sent him crying all day long?”

“He wouldn’t cry”

“You don’t know how he feels, believe me Bella. I know how he feels”

Lewis was delighted when ever he talked about Bella with Alice or Dylan. He have been holding up his feelings towards Bella for almost a year. But he knew that Bella wasn’t serious with her yet as he was. Nevertheless, he never gave up making her love him more and more as days passes. Although Bella and Alice sometimes questioned him about his relationship with his wife, he told them it was fine.

“Alisa wouldn’t know about this at all” he once said to Bella. She held her thought to herself since then.

When their monthsary came, they always went out together. Always avoiding the places where there would revealed their secret but managed to get the best time ever. Spending the time together, they became closer than ever, but they were facing with many obstacles ahead. After getting their 5th monthsary, another teacher fell in love with Bella. His name was Alex and he and Lewis was close friends.

“What the hell are you doing!” screamed Alice to her computer when she texted Lewis, although she knew he wouldn’t hear her scream but she let it out anyway.

[I’m useless] he told her.

As the epic battle of trying to get them back together, Alice realized that Bella finally showed her true emotions towards Lewis. She was crying so much and locked herself in her room. Lewis was the same, he was crying despite the fact he was a grown man, but love is the only reason where it could pull down a man and cry like a baby. Lewis wanted to break up with Bella due to Alex, her teacher wanted to be with her. Lewis was useless, as what Bella said to Alice and he accepted it. It was a disaster, Alex asked Lewis to help him propose to Bella and Lewis was left with no potion to end their relationship. He could just tell Alex that he was with Bella since he was married, and he couldn’t tell him that Bella had a boy friend other than telling the truth. So Lewis took the only option he thought of, end it. But Alice had other idea, since she was the one who got them together, she wanted it to last. She insisted to think of something else. Bella was crying and Dylan was helping her up. Where he was taking care of Bella, Alice made took one desperate approached.

“Tell me you love her” she told Lewis, he didn’t see anything that was appropriate to tell her that since she knew about it already, but he did as she said.

“I love Bella, because she is the only person that understands me in this entire world” Alice nodded. Then she asked Bella to do the same

“I love him, I love Lewis not as a best friend or whatever he thinks I do, I love him as a lover”

After receiving that, Alice copy pastes their chat and gave it to each one of them. After that, Lewis then realized what he was doing and what he was about to lose. Bella was already at the verge of losing hope and actually gave up when she got an urgent text from Alice saying to look at Lewis’ text. Bella found it hopeless to look at it and already thought of accepting Alex, but she did and found out that Lewis was also proposing her! Her head was pinning in seconds. Dylan suddenly told her to accept Alex where Alice told her to accept Lewis.

Lewis went to desperation as he heard what Dylan had done. He felt betrayed but he knew he was wrong, and he wanted to make thing right again. Bella on the other hand, was confused; she didn’t know what to do. Everyone wanted an answer from her on that spot and she had it. She told everyone that she wanted to think and left the chat room. During that time, Lewis thought hard, wondering how to get back the love he had lost. The first thing he did was talk with his best friend, Dylan. He called him and received an angry scowled. He discusses things with him and finally Dylan gave in.

When Bella went back online, Alice texted her asking what was her answer. She told her to wait as she tired to play around with Lewis. She was happy that Lewis wanted to go back with her but she felt betrayed by her cousin who suddenly went on Lewis’s side. As for Lewis, he was nervous, he didn’t know who Bella would pick and he regretted what he had done. He talked to Alice about it but she kept quite, saying only a few words waiting like he was for Bella’s answer.

Lewis went panic as Bella suddenly started to text him and he was afraid to read her text. Then, slowly she started to talk to him, he only watched as she text him one by one. When Lewis found out that she had rejected Alex and accepted him back, he screamed on the top of his lungs. He was so happy that he called Bella on that spot and told her that he loved her.

After that event, Alex never interfered anymore, although he sometimes went to walk with Bella a bit to close and that leads to Lewis being all jealous up. But soon, the news about Alex faded away and their world was back with only the two of them as they were concerned.

Dylan started to get close with Bella and she was always at his house when ever she was free. And soon, they started to meet up almost everyday even without her going out with Lewis. Lewis started to get suspicious with Dylan as well as Alice. One evening, Alice went online and Bella suddenly texted her [help me!!!] and that was the start of another crisis they faced.

Dylan suddenly confessed to Bella that he was in love with her. Bella asked Alice how to do where she didn’t want to tell Lewis about it. Despite the fact she was trying to hide it, Lewis knew about it and he was furious. Taking it out on Alice, as she volunteered to be one, he tried to think what was going on. ‘Dylan is going to get married!’ he thought with anger ‘what the heck is he falling in love with my girl friend!’

Alice tried to calm him down and advice him not to do anything rational. Bella tried to calm herself down when Dylan confesses to her. She tried to find some advice from Alice but she seemed a bit off the edge ever since she told her about Dylan. The, without her notice anything, her cousin suddenly told her to give him time to think about everything. They lost contact for a few days and Bella was sent crying for losing her so call brother.

After a few days, Alice tried to cheer Bella up by going around the city with her and they talked all day.

“You kept texting with Luke” observed Bella.

Alice smiled, “you know me”

“So when are you going to start dating him” asked Bella.

“I’m taking this relationship slow okay, his different”

“He is serious with you, his not like Lewis-”

“He on the matter of fact is more serious than I see Luke is towards me Bella” said Alice suddenly taking a turn to the left.

Bella looked outside, “how do you know about that” she asked

“I can see how serious he is by talking about you. And I still want you guys to get married!” Alice said.

Before Bella could say a word, Alice pushed the gas and screams was heard rather than complains from Bella.

That following day, Lewis got a threat from Dylan.

“I’ll tell your wife” he threat, but then he smiled and said “kidding” and walked away leaving Lewis shocked.

The next day, Dylan finally contacted Bella saying that he was confused.

“I thought I love you as I loved my fiancée, Diana, but I was wrong. I loved you as my sister” he said.

Bella was happy with that and they went back with being brother and sisters.

After getting their 1 year anniversary, it was a school holiday and they started to met up together almost everyday. They went out five times a week and it was as if nothing could stop them being with together. When one day, Lewis received and email from his wife’s best friend, Downey the Dog. It was the picture him and Bella and a message.
[Leave that girl or else I’ll tell Alisa…]

Lewis had no choice to leave the person he loved the most. Then he suddenly received a new email.
[You only have until the end of this month. Or else she’ll get hurt]

Tears flow down his cheek. Lewis went under desperation when ever he remembered it. The first person he told was Alice; she was the cause of them being together until now and when she heard the news, she swore before she tried to give a way to go around it.

“There have to be a way!” said Alice desperately.

But Lewis only said nothing. Lewis looked at his picture with Bella,

“There isn’t a way out” he started suddenly, “if Alisa knew about it, Bella will suffer more than she will be after this”

“What are you saying?” questioned Alice not liking by the way he talked.

“Downey-”

“The Dog” Alice added

“Told me that all about what Alisa did to my ex-s. She did so many things to them” Lewis said breaking down thinking what will happen to Bella. “Until they even went out of country because of her”

Alice was silenced. ‘She is that crazy?’ she thought. “Cant you fake the break up?”

“That man, that bloody idiot Dog, he told me to record everything when I break up with her and I have to hurt her” he chocked at the end.

Alice swear a bit and then kept quite. “There is no way out of this?” she said quietly, afraid of the answer.

“No”

Days pass after that, Lewis told Dylan about it and he got a punch on the face because of that. But he requested something with Alice and Dylan.

“Please help her get over me” he begged. “Don’t let her cry on her own, and make her happy without me”

“Alice” he said and Alice looked at him with fresh tears. “If she hates me”

Alice started to say something but she held it,

“Let her hate me, and you will hate me as well”

“I wouldn’t!” Alice shouted

“You will for her, and I will hate my self in return” he promised. He looked at Dylan who was standing at the far end of the room, “Dylan” he called, but he didn’t looked back, just kept giving him his back. “Please support her, don’t let her fall or whatever that could make her cry-” Lewis fell to the ground with a book.

“I will support her” said Dylan and he left the room.

“I will lie to her about this, and will not say the truth, and I will act as if I hated you despite the fact I knew the truth” said Alice.

Lewis stayed on the floor, tears went down his face, but it wasn’t because of the book that Dylan just threw, but it was tears of sorrow.

Days pass and Lewis spent all his day with Bella. Crying when ever he remembered his problem and wanting the time to stop, but the time kept moving, and he was in a pit of a black hole. He told her that he loved her so much, and what ever happens doesn’t forget that he loved her more that anything. Bella became worried by Lewis’s strange behavior but both Alice and Dylan changed the subject about it and she kept it to herself after that.

When the end of that month, Lewis woke up, wishing it wouldn’t be the day he would hurt Bella. He cried on bed feel glad that his wife was out for work already. He got dress, took out his keys-thought he wished it would went missing- and took a step outside his house. Getting ready, he went off to meet his loved girl friend. On his way to her, he thought of how everything started, the time where Alice told them that they have feelings towards each other. That night he called Bella, asking her to be his girl friend. The following day he told Dylan about it and he agreed to help him. Dylan got Bella for a ride to a place and when they arrived, she saw Lewis. After that, Dylan’s fiancée came, and he left Bella with him. ‘The face that she made when Dylan left her’ thought Lewis smiling. They then went for a walk and then for a ride in his car.

“Where are you taking me?” asked Bella freaking out a little bit.

Lewis took her to the beach and then went for a walk. Bella feeling a bit awkward walked in silence until she didn’t realize that her teacher has stopped. She looked back at the teacher where he started walking again towards her. Lewis took both of her hands and looked at her eyes. He took a steep closer to her and Bella took a steep to the back.

“I’m not playing with you Bella, and I’m really in love with you” he said.

“I don’t know about love,” she said “I’ve never been in love before”

“I’ll teach you, and I’ll love you forever” he said “will you be my girlfriend?” he asked for the second time and Bella chocked out the word Yes at then end.

His cell phone suddenly blew up with Bella’s ringtone and interrupted his flash back. Bella had arrived at the place where he wanted to meet her. Before going out of the car, he wore his black shades to hide his tears. Calling Alice and Dylan who was already there hiding behind some bushes next to where Bella was standing. He took a step but tears were already in his eyes. A message came from Alice, [be strong] he remembered where Bella always told him to be strong in what ever life brings him. He took a deep breath and exhale. Walking slowly towards Bella, she noticed him when he was a meter apart. Bella looked at him, wondering what was he up to with his shades on. There was no sun shining on them due to them meeting up under a tree.

“Bella” started Lewis, and then suddenly they heard something moved at a bush near them, noises was heard after that and suddenly a cat ran out of the bush.

“How did a cat be there?” wondered Bella approaching the bush. Lewis saw Alice’s jacket under it.

“Bella!” he said shocking her as well as the people inside the bush. “Listen to me,” He started.

Bella looked at him, failed to read his face.

“I don’t love you, I have never loved you. I was only playing with you because I was bored of myself” tears was flowing down his cheek and he had to looked away. He made a fake laugh which hurt him inside out,

“w-why?” chocked Bella suddenly.

He couldn’t stand the thought of her crying and hurting, so he had to end it as fast as he could “my friend challenged me whether I was as I used to, being able to make anyone loved me. And I proved them right. I was able to make you loved me and felt inside my game. I hate you Bella, goodbye” he said, taking quick peek at her he walked away. Leaving his ex girlfriend crying on the ground.

At the car where he was about to opened the door, someone pulled him around and punched him on the face. He fell to the ground to see Dylan was standing in from of him.

“I promise you I’ll support her after this” he said and answered a call from Bella. He saw Alice standing at the far side of a small wooden house, looking at him. Alice then answered a call and went running towards Bella after that. Lewis drove away; leaving everything he knew and stopped at the beach where everything started. Looking at the sunset, he cried. All night ignoring the call from his wife, when he stopped crying for a while, he answered the call, hearing the worried wife. He assures her that he was fine and he drove towards home.

At school, Alice was with Bella, helping her to get over her ex, acting that he hates him as well.

“Alice” said a voice behind her when she was talking with Bella. She looked back and it was Luke.

“What happen to your hair Luke?” joked Bella,

“He just cut his hair yesterday Bella, it’s cute” commented Alice.

Bella laughed and she looked at her watch. “Oh no, I’m late for my extra class with Sir Dylan!” shouted Bella and dashed away saying bye while she ran.

“Extra class?” asked Luke towards Alice.

She smiled, “just a cover up by us, Dylan’s taking her to play some games as usual”

“She seems fine thought, a bit happier” comment Luke after a while.

Alice didn’t answer; she only smiled while looking at a crowd of students going out of class. Luke followed her gaze and saw a teacher; he was looking down from the third floor towards a girl, who was running to an extra class she was late for. Alice looked at Luke; “she a bit happier because of our hard work, and that was his last request towards us”

the teacher looked at them,

“You made a promise” reminded Luke

“And I will keep it until that time will come” answered Alice walking away.

Ending something means a new beginning. Even though it never seems to be, but what lies ahead was never told, until we tried out hardest, we can never see the future. Learning from our mistakes from the pass, remembering it in the present, and hoping for a new in the future. Only god knows where the future lies for us.

sleepless night

im sooo sleppy~~ but i cant sleep!!! cause i cant sleep! okay..im chatting that's why i cant sleep~ ^^, anyway im having the time of my life~ XD hehehe so i'll just talk random okay??....hmm....where to start?? okay..i miss my class soo very the damn much! and also my sister just went off to japan again for the second time....damn. i want to go to japan!!! but she did buy me really cool stuff from japan. including a main's costume!!! i was like... WTH! but i liked it. but i have to wear it at home only. cnat wear it on the outside world~ hahaha im serious! i like wearing it but i dont dare to even wear it out side of my house!!!! i'll die of embarrement! (lurus kh tu speeling ah? sorry spelling error XD) anyway~ she also bought me a jacket...2 actually and 1 long sleeve t-shirt. is that even a t-shirt~ so yeah~ i wore one of it yesterday when i was going to the mall with my cousin and friends. oh yeah~ yesterday was soo fun! i wantched 2 movie!!!! new moon and also ninja assasin~....new moon was the second time i watched it and i was actually sleepy~....but they i was kidnapped cause that person had to go met up with his sister. so yeah, i tag along~ and didnt went back in the cinema~ hahahaha. after that we had lunch~...well I had lunch..he just sat there holding my jacket cause it was cold. one of my cousin wasbeing so annoying ahd all of us were a bit annoyed. well nmanya annoying~ cna jua, she just cant stop talking and complaining so i finally said 'bnyk ckp jua ko **** eh' (name sensored) and she kept quite. i know iwas harsh....but if no one said anything she'll never stop talking and talking and talking and talking!!!!.....yes im annoyed. anyway after that~ we met up with cg Salnee~~ =D what else happened??....hmm...me and my cousin went to look at the swimming pool which is sooo booring looking. what? i though it was big and deep...but it turns out it wasnt. well...syukur th..i think i want to have a swim there for once. hahahaah XD. ok what else??....random time......hmmm....okay2...im in love...apannn jauh...but that is random. anyway i still cant sleep....still chatting like hell here...at least i only have 2 person the talk to..last time i had what?? 7 people to talk to...i was a busy women that night....hahaha jgn lain eh......hmmm.....annoying girl.....not my cousin...haha i know you guys dont know her but i hate herrrr..........:@

bestfriends

best friends? do you have one? or should i say 5? yeah...i do, i guess. why i'm not certain? ahahah that because i dont know if they really are my best friends ever since the incident a few months back. so here is how it all started actually;

in my early form 2 2008, i had a really big fight with my previous best friend and we never talk to each other anymore. yeah, i know~ it's a bit over the top but she started it. so yeah, i never got to talk with her anymore ever since that fight. so after loosing another fake best friend, i be friend with 5 people. they were nest friends ever since form 1 2007, so they all were really tight when i joined them. as usual~ best friends share everything with each other and i became attached to them in no time~ face it, i'm friendly ;D okay so yeah~ i met my present best friends last year~ and i joined in their group i guess. when we were in form 3 2009, our seat were really seperated but at least we were still tight. that was after i started haging out with a guy. and let me tell you, his a really amazing guy! and what's wrong in that huh? not long, i fell in love~ hahaha (n//n) so i started spending my time with him more than my other friends and since i was in love you know the drill right?? hahahah wajib tu rsanya~ hahahaha XP

when my best friends heard about it, they wanted to report me despite the face that out teacher wanted to give a second chance. during that time, i was still out of my mind with the person i love and left my best friends. i know it was a bad thing to do~ and i admit i regreat ever soing all of that but what can i do to stop what i have done in the past? nothing right? =) so yeah, on the last day of the 2nd term of school i suddeny woken up from my long so very long sleep.

i told him about it and he agreed, we were to lose contact until everything was back together. when i finally apologised to my best friends, expecting a welcom back smile from my beloved friends, the other thing happened. they told me that they hated me and to just do what ever i want with my life. my reaction?? the world i know became hell. yes, i know i'm still holding it until now, but try feeling what i'm feeling right now~ rejected by your own bestfriends. the only thing i could do was cry and cry. i cried so hard that day but i was strong due to my other friends where i made with in the times i was still a bit crazy and that was also the only thing that helped me with everything.

when the school was reopened, getting ready ti apologised to my teacher as well as my best friends again i met him. still remembering the agreement, i looked away and we didnt talked, smiled or even looked at each other. so yeah, giving up something to get something in return. the first day was hell, my best friends didnt want to talk to me, my teacher was cold towards me and not talking to him was even more painful. when finally my teacher forgave us, i need to worry about my best friends for then on. that time was the season of exams~ adehhh ada g season tu~ hahahah anyway yeah~ it was the qualifying exam people so it was hard for me to deal with it.

when i was at home, suppose to be studying, i made a letter for each one of them saying sorry to each one of them and everything. i was seriously in hell at that time and cried everytime i was alone. the next day, i got to class early and put the letter inder their table. when the exam was about to start, the first person to say thnks to me was also the same person to smile to me, it was Caring, and that made me smile back. she's the only person that i really apriciate right now and thnks to her i was feeling better as well. i was an empty soul walking with no real reason.

soon after, i got used to my best friends again and we we back to our usual life. after getting used to my best friend i could finally talk to him after that. but eversince that day, i always tried to avoid my best friends, i dont know why but everytime im with them i felt really ackward. i know they never experience what i've done and they somehow really tried to remind me of that. maybe it was only me but i didnt liked it so i always ran away.

sometimes, i thought about what they had done to me, and i wondered, why didnt they talked to me about it when i was going crazy? why didnt they tried to advice me? was that friends? not giving any second chance is what a BEST FRIEND should do???? dont make fun of me or mock me! yeah so what i was somehow a new comer in your group/geng? is that what best friends should do? so yeah, i was hurt by what they tried to do to me, maybe it was the right thing to do for them but it was the wrong thing to do in all of our point of view. even out own teacher, who was holding it so much even before they knew it gave us a second chance. how i wanted to shout to them for doing that to me, for betraying my trust in them as my very first real best friends. well, i guess i was wrong =)

so let me ask you, what is a best friend?

~2008~

2009=')

sick!

hahah *sniff sniff*......ah...ah.......achoooo!!!!!.....*sniff sniff*....yes...i know...i'm sick....so how i got sick???.....*sniff sniff*.......it was....o.o i dont really know how i get sick. okay, it was actually because i was love sick. okay, im not sure i was actually love sick at all, my brother-who was sick after going back from uk-was sick and he actually cough in front of my face, so yeah i was sick ==' anyway it's been like.....4 days....and the first, i got a fever and a sore throat. then the second day which i was at Husna's house for a bbq, i was having i high fever (when i got home) and i was actually lying on the ground with a big cold. third day, i started to cough for a bit and my fever got down, but running nose was a big problem!!! i was using a full big plastic bag because of it. fourth, which is today, just a cough...but im going to the mall today with Babe Qilah, Bebek Feefah n Debby. so yeah...wish me luck...

cant sleep thanks you 'paranormal activity' >=)

thank you very much to 'paranormal activity' that i didn't even manged to get any sleep last night. well, i finally got to sleep, but it was way pass my bed time and it was already 4am great and i woke up around 7 this morning with a dream that all of my cousin could not sleep too. so if your wondering what are paranormal activity, go look for it at youtube or what ever or just buy the cd. but i'll explain it to you for a bit.

the story is, as it is in the title, about paranormal activity. it was located in Chicago i think and a couple maybe just moved in to their new house. dont blame me if i'm wrong. cause i arrived late at the gathering at my cousin and i only managed to watch it half. so yeah~ the couple manes are Katie and Micah. the one that are being disturb here is Katie. the story was recorded in a video cam and well it really do show how the 'thing' try to get Katie. the part where i'm watching it was near the end already so if you could guess, horror movied near the end is freaky right? hahaha yeah~ so here is where i started watching

at first Katie was possesed, and she was standing looking at her husband all night from 12am until 3. when it was 3 she walk down and we couldnt see her. when her husband finally realised his wife is gone, he went to search for her at found her outside at the swings. Micah try to tell her to go to bed, but she want to be left alone. so Micah, being a good husband, went back up stairs to get her a blanket. in their bedroom, Micah suddenly hear some noice and look back, Kaite was suddenly at the door and she asked why is Micah up? sooo that really showed that Katie was being possesed at that time and didnt realised anything.

another night was where Micah put floor/flower?? tapung wh...my english suck at this time having only 3 hours of sleep==''. anyway, yeah~ he put that on the floor and they went to bed. later that night, foot prints...well...not foot prints, hand prints was seen on the floor. weird and we all scremed when we saw it.

the 'thing' tried to distured them everynight with different ways and all. once their door suddenly close it self. another was where the light was switched on on it own. oh man, i'll never get to sleep after this. but the 18 day it went worse.

that night, the 'thing' went to their room and tried to take Kaite but it didnt. her blanket was blown by something but that was only it. so it showed that the 'thing' was going to take her. and by the next night, it did! her leg was draged and she screamed for her husband. it was freaky and as usual, everyoned screamed!!! Kaite was dragged down the stairs as well~ as what we heard in the movie. that morning, she showed that she was bitten by something cause bite marks was at her back. ouch babe!!!! and freaky!!!! and by that day, she was possesed.

by the 20th night, kaite went to do the same thing, she wakes up at 12am and then looked at her sleeping husband until it was 3. at that time i was already screaming that she will go down and she did. after awhile, we heard a scream and Micah jump off from bed and ran down. the video cam was left up stairs at bed so we could only managed to hear their voiced. we heard that Micah was hurt and then we heard footsteps. we waited and waited and Katie appeared with blood on her cloths and a knife in hand. she killed Micah. she sat near her bed for the whole day. when the police suddenly arrived, the other room across theirs switched on and the off. the police came and katie suddenly went screaming to the policed saying "where's Micah where's Micah!' and she was shoot dead. that was the end of the movie and at the last part, the 'thing' finally left her when the light was switched on across the room.

so the only reason why i coundnt get any sleep was because i was sleeping alone and the scene where she was draged out always came across my head. this is the second night after the movie, the first night i managed to get some sleep casue i was at my cousin's house for a sleepover~~ but tonight i was sleeping alone and didnt managed to get any sleep until 4am!!! and that i tried to tired my self out as well. so yeah, where i was still at my cousin's house, Wapi one of my cousin as well, an lower 6th told me that the movie was fake. i was....o.o are you sure!!!??? it looked real to me! and he said they made it with computer and everything. and i was...so what was the point of us sleeping together last night. that was yesterday~ bit i still couldnt get any sleep so no help there for telling me about the movie is fake. i was still afraid of it.

taht all for now~ well forgave me about spelling errors okay~ i dont look at the screen if im typing~

out
Appy143

letting it out here ==''

haha...guess what? it's a good thing i haven't got much followers on my blog. well...to tell you the truth...i'm sad. I've been sad for a while already. why you might ask me? well..it's because people kept making me feel insecure. why guys? why??? why cant you just leave me alone. i never tag along in your relationship, i never made you feel insecure about your relationship. so what i'm a bit different? why do you guys have to tag along?? i know my true feelings already and i know he's. if i didnt know his feelings, then why am i still with him until now?? why do you guys even think of me sticking with him in my situation already?? it's because i love him and i know he love me too. mind your own business. thnks to you guys, i'm feeling insecure all the time, i dont even know my feelings anymore thnks to you guys. just stop butting in. if i need your help then i'll ask you to, but if i dont...then just mind your own business. it's my feelings...not yours and you guys dont have the right to even make me feel this way. urgh! i wanna cry.....im feeling insecure even deeply it's not fair, i dont want any of this. please....just stop asking me questions...

attacked by animals

it was a normal day on 30th October 09. well...that was what i was planing on to. it got attacked by 2 animals that day and one succeed. the animals are...the ugly Monkey and C Mata Merah Hamster. can you guys figured out which animal got me? i got a bleeding finger after that.

so here how it start. i was just playing with my computer~ cheeking my facebook and everything. going online and chatting with some of my friends. that i saw something moved at the corner of my eyes, i thought it was a cat, but that's impossible, i don't have a cat in the house. my dad don't like them. i turn my head and saw a monkey. the monkey was also looking at me. i looked back at my computer and turn back my head almost suddenly. the monkay as still looking at me, and my head suddenly went lagging. i looked at the monkey and finally realised that there's a monkey at my house!!!

i tried to throw something to it but when i looked at the table. there wasnt even anything big for me to throw at it. so the only thing that i can think of was to scream. so i screamed and the monkey ran away to my sister's room. my mom shouted from downstairs asking why i was shouting and i told her that there was a monkey. this is the second time a monkey got into the house. my sister, who was sleeping woke up cause of my scream, got up taking a broom. i was holding a mop and a long stick, i gave it to my mom after that. we went to my sister's room and the monkey as no where to be seen. the window was open so we figured that it ran away.

the second animal was a hamster. my sister told me that C Mata Merah, if you hold it gently, it wouldnt bite. so after feeling bored, i went to play with it. when i tried to hold it. at first it smelled my hand. then suddenly it bit me! i was....'BANGKAI KO!!!' my had eventually let out a red liquid which is my blood. the blood made a lot of mess on the tissue i used and eventually i didnt want to play with the hamster again.

so it was really unfortunate of me to be attacked by two animals in one day!

chocolates

just got home after a cancel band practice. i actually woke up 815am but my band starts at 8. usual thing for a person like e to be late for band and i know the teacher's knew about it as well. but unfortunately, when i arrived to school. no one was there. great! i thought no band. so i called back my mom asking her to pick me up. then when i got home home and change, actually having to block the door only cause my door was broken last night, i went to use my sister's lappy. not even knowing where she went morning and actually having a lot of fun in her room =D

i went to on my facebook, twitter and of course blog. then update each account while eating chocolate from last night that my dad brought for me. while eating, it made me though of a cool status for my facebook. ' a room full of chocolates, not a single one match how much sweet you are to me =)' yeah well....i really do like the sound of it and it reminded me of someone that i really love~ =p

i'm bored here

actually just woke up at 1123am....since i slept at 1245am last night haha. that was actualyly due to a fight with my friends's cousin which i'll tell later on. anyway, since you all read the title of this, i'm bored. and i seriously am bored. could anyone really died of boredom??? i wish i could, at least h ave something to do right?? hahah

anyway, so i'm guessing i;m just talk random here okay?? hmm, i'm watching fruit basket but not really watching cause im writing this blog. then text messeging with my friends made me ever forget about the tv in front of me hahaha. i went to get my sister's lappy and i on my facebook with twitter, as well as blog. then, facebook was a little boring for me, then twitter, all i had to go is just wait for someone to post something and read them. so blog was the only thing that i have to do something to update it. i;'m still at the verge of trying to make this blog a cool thing to watch at. then, i wonder how to make it and gave up. i asked Brandon how to do thing in blog and he happily helped. Thanks Brandon =) so eyah, i'm bored and tomorrow i'm going to school just to kill my time of boredom. it's better to go to school than do nothing at school right??

farewell MB3C

today was the returning of out text book for the form 3C~ therefore this day was the last day we were classmates~ it's very sad and very touching. so here's how it all started from the start until everyone came home at 1230.

i got to school, knowing that our class was being used by the year 8. so i went to search for my classmates at the canteen. when one of my friends went running to me saying that they missed me we went to sit at the canteen. our class was divided into two; boys and girls, and the boys are with the other boys of the form 3. after a few minutes~...which leads to a few hours after than and our form teacher was nowhere to be seen. at the end, my friend and I went to look for her in the staff but failed. at the end, we called her and she was out marking for the exam paper. so who was going to take our text book????

when a relief teacher came, she went to set out books and we sent them away. when that was over, the boys went to play football at the field. my friends and i went to the track, after getting permission, and ran at the track. 2 rounds =D

when that was over, we went back to the canteen and everyone was about to order jollibee. they were mad at us for missing without a trace. i went to business after that, helping the others on what to order. we collected our money and then when we called jollibee....there were not making any delivery. so we went to look for other fast food restaurant. we found KFC and MacDonald. we picked MacDonald and we were back to being busy of what people wanted to order.

while waiting for that order to arrived, some of us waited at the canteen area and there came back the boys. sweating n smelly. one of the boys were wearing shorts cause his pants had a hole in it, if you know what i mean~ haha when they boys was going to drink. came the disciplin teacher telling us to go home. well, we pick up our stuff and went to the front while the boys at the back. but no way are we going home!!

when the boys was at the back, the disciplin teacher came back to them and told them to go home again. it was a good thing we were at the front =p while waiting for the delivery, some of us went to the library cause the day was really and i mean really hot! after a few books to read and put back, the delivery finally came and we ate happily with no intruption.

when after we ate, we met up with some of the boys and we form a group. when that happends. one of my friends started to say sorry to everyone and another continues. soon after, everyone said sorry to each other and we all started to cry. i went to hug one of my firends and cried a little with her. it was a little hard for me cause i'm not good at crying in that kind of situation. so yeah~ everyone was saying sorry and there were lots of huggs.

truth is everyone that was, for me ah, the most sweet and sour day of my life. this is the last day for us to be together, the last day of MB3C. afther that, a new chapter of our life would start. i will miss my class, WE will miss out MB3C. all the parties, all the teachers, all the events that happened will stay in all of our hearts..

we'll be moving to form 4 next year but everything will not be forgotten. 3 years with the 20 person. 2 years with the sme 24 person. and 1 year with 26 people, and this year was the best. my MB3C, our MB3C our family may all of us stay friends forever =)